I’m probably not the least tech-savvy person you know, but I’m confident I’m not the most either. Fortunately, I have a reliable and competent expert I can call on when I encounter computer challenges that require more technological expertise than I possess. About the only tool in my personal toolbox is to shut it down and reboot. Quite often, that simple step solves the problem, and I’m able to continue my work.
I like to think of a new year as an opportunity for a similar kind of reboot, especially when it comes to life and relationships. Without much warning, we can drift into ruts. Days pass, routines settle in, and we operate more on autopilot than intention. That’s not always bad, but over time it can quietly rob us of growth, purpose, and connection. Relationships, in particular, can grow stale if they aren’t treated with care.
As 2026 has arrived, it may be worth taking an honest look at the relationships in your life. Some may be strong and life-giving. Others may feel strained, distant, or simply neglected. That kind of reflection can be uncomfortable, because recognizing a problem often means acknowledging the need for change. And if we’re honest, change is a word that carries some baggage. Many of us have begun a new year with good intentions, only to watch those intentions fade within days or weeks.
This week, I’d like to share a tool you may find helpful if you want your desired changes to last beyond January. It was developed in 1991 by T. Knoster and identifies five essential elements required for meaningful and lasting change: vision, skills, incentives, resources, and an action plan. Miss any one of these, and the likelihood of real change drops dramatically. You can have four out of five and still find yourself stuck.
Without a clear vision, confusion is almost guaranteed. You may be working hard, but toward what, exactly? Without clarity, progress is difficult to recognize, and discouragement often follows. Vision gives direction and helps you know when you’re moving forward.
Even with vision, a lack of skills can lead to anxiety. You know what you want to change, but you don’t quite know how. That gap between desire and ability can be frustrating and exhausting.
Add vision and skills, but remove incentives -the deeper “why” – and resistance often sets in. You’ve probably heard it said that people resist change. I believe it’s more accurate to say people resist being changed. Most of us can recall changes we chose to make and are still glad we did. We can also remember times when someone else insisted we change, and we may still feel a twinge of resentment. Incentives matter because they carry us through moments when motivation, energy, and enthusiasm naturally dip.
Resources are another critical component. Even with vision, skills, and incentives, progress can stall if you lack the necessary time, support, tools, or emotional bandwidth. Few things are more discouraging than wanting to change but feeling unequipped to do so.
Finally, meaningful change requires an action plan. Without one, it’s easy to stay busy without making progress, like walking quickly on a treadmill and never getting anywhere.
As you move through 2026, I invite you, as I invite myself, to reflect on areas of life and relationships that aren’t quite where you’d like them to be. A thoughtful reboot, one that includes all five of these elements, may help you enter 2027 with a deeper sense of growth, connection, and satisfaction.
Ron Price, who has a master’s degree in counseling from the University of New Mexico, is author of the “Play Nice in Your Sandbox” book series and creator of the CPR Mastery video course. He is available for workshops and staff training. Contact Ron at ron@ronprice.com and (505) 324-6328. Learn more at ronprice.com.
